Q A Z Z O O . C O M

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Selling your home can be like giving away a pet. It just feels wrong and you wish you didn’t have to but the dog bit your kid so it has to go. In my case it was my house that bit me!

The house is great and I wanted to live there since the day I first saw it when it was being built. I was 24 years old and I saw this house that was everything I wanted. Turns out it was built by a guy about 24 who had a wealthy family. The neighborhood that I loved. Quaint and quiet. The construction material that I prefer over all others, brick. At the end of a cul-de-sac. A pool. Oh that pool was inviting. The day I saw it I was appraising the house next door and the pool heater was on…in November! That’s right the owner built the pool first and was enjoying it before the house was completed. In the cold I saw the mist rising off of the pool like a mystical dream. I was entranced and determined to one day own that house. . Fast forward 20 years and there I am in a position to buy the house that I had lusted over like some men lust after Jessica Alba.

forsaleNow that I live there the blemishes start to show and the difficulty in maintenance is ever present. The family I planned on having never materialized and now it is sort of an albatross around my neck. But like the pet, it is hard to separate from. So I live there and love it. I enjoy going home. I enjoy being at home. I feel comfortable in my home. Blemishes and all. Jessica Alba has bad hair days.

So what happens?

Some very clever real estate agent named Vic Pascoe from Keller Williams lives down the street from me and he comes to my house and knocks on the door. He tells me he has a buyer that may want to buy my house. The same house that I curse when it rains and the impromptu interior waterfall starts to flow. I have never been able to figure out the leak, but it’s only been eight years and I apparently am in no rush. The same house that I had lusted after for nearly 20 years. Finally had the opportunity to buy and now some selfish bastard wants to take my house from me.

So how much?

Well the offer is reasonable but I don’t want to sell my house.

But that is a great offer.

This means I will never have to have an open house or a sign in my front yard. This means that I will have to do ZERO repairs, but I still was not thinking of selling and the idea doesn’t please my wife who also loves and hates the house.

So we are in a holding pattern, waiting for the buyer to make the offer that we both think will be a reasonable offer, if we wanted to sell our home. Which we do not want to do. So the two morals here are:

  1. A plucky real estate agent can make things happen even when there is nothing happening.
  2. Selling a house is never easy. Even when it is.

I will let you know what happens.

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